A Counterintuitive Way to Experience More Pleasure

A Counterintuitive Way to Experience More Pleasure

Our society’s been trained that positive attributes are good and negative attributes are bad.

What I want to share today is the idea that they’re neither good nor bad. They simply are. And if you get in touch with your “negative” self-expression, you can actually experience more “positive” expression and pleasure than ever before.

First, I need to define positive and negative self-expression.

In short, positive self-expression is all the attributes that we have and hold as humans that are liked by our peers, our families, and our tribes. Most people want to be seen as being inclusive, compassionate, caring, loving, and supportive.

It becomes a lot more tricky when we talk about negative self-expression. Negative self-expression covers things like aggression, competition, isolation, jealousy, rage, really anything to do with feeling that you can’t be happy for other people.

I like to think about it in terms of polarities. The world around us is nothing but polarities. We see it everywhere and we’re not really aware of it.

You have it in North and South, plus and minus, sweet and sour, hot and cold, light and dark, yin and yang.

In essence, nothing exists without an opposite. If you take that idea and apply it to human emotions, then you can’t have a positive expression unless you have a polarity, or opposite, negative expression.

Where it gets interesting is in order for you to truly step into your most expressive version of yourself, you have to get in contact with your negative self-expression.

Some people call it their lower-self and higher-self. I don’t particularly like those because they indicate that there’s a high and a low to it. I see this more as a side-by-side comparison.

On one side, you have the capacity to be a ruthless dictator with the right support around you, and on the other side, you have the capacity to be here for the good of the whole, with the right support around it.

But the point is, when you shut down negative self-expression, you also shut down your ability to have positive self-expression.

This is because you can’t be fully expressed on one side and restricted on the other.

Some of the work I do with every client is to help them start to confront their negative self-expression.

I’ll have them stand up, give them foam cubes and a tennis racket, and we’ll start moving some energy to activate the body by hitting the cubes. The goal is to not restrict whatever energy flows through. It’s not about being rageful or pursuing hatred towards something, it’s equal to hitting a punching bag or going for a run. It’s simply meant to charge up the body.

As an example, let’s say that somebody really wants to launch their own business, and they work in a company doing really well. But they know, in a higher sense self, they have the capacity to step out and do something which is uniquely theirs and reap the benefits from launching their own product.

But there’s an inner voice. An inner critic that says, “You don’t have it. You should just stay here, where it’s more comfortable.” That voice is negative self-expression.

So I help them create an environment they trust. An environment without judgment. There are no right or wrongs, ups or downs. We’re not looking for anything specific other than expression and exposure.

When they start to realize the environment we create is supportive, they can release the energy they’re holding inside.

Most people get surprised by how angry they are at themselves and for how many things they’re angry at. That in itself is a tremendous achievement.

Those who are “brave enough” to do this work have reached the level of self-reflection where they’re willing to take a really, really really hard look at themselves. When they stop playing with the energy of the negative self intent, they can very quickly experience far more pleasure than before. The more pleasure they experience, the more in touch they are with their own negative self-expression.

This work can take a long time, months and sometimes years. I’m still doing it in my own way.

But it all leads to this one very magical place. At some point, when enough of the negative self intent has been exposed, you have to answer a simple question:

“Do I wish to continue treating myself this way?”

All this leads to the decision not to treat yourself that way anymore. You shift into positive self-expression.

And when you step into our positive self-expression, you step into our zone of genius.

This is where we are divinely guided by universal energy. But that’s a totally different topic I’ll get into at another time. 

Get Support to Tap Into Your Negative Self-Expression

If what I’ve shared in this article resonates with you, and you’d like support tapping into the power of your negative self-expression, I want to help.

The easiest way to get started working with me is to sign up for a free consultation. (Don’t worry, we won’t get out the foam blocks and tennis racket in our first consultation.)

I look forward to working with you!

3 Tools to Let Go of Stress and Anxiety, and Get into Your Body, at Any Time!

by Nicolai Grosell, CCEP, EMM  |  www.NicolaiGrosell.com

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